One Night Out in the Pub
The music rolled off the keys
like a particularly satisfying swear word off the tongue.
No breath necessary.
Confusion of styles
wove light and night in warp and woof,
while tweeters and woofers washed their mouths with soap
just to get to the next chorus.
The music of the spheres
had a whole new rhythm section
there.
My own voice betrayed me.
My own ear mislaid the chords
and made my lyric the grab-bag for miscreants
to the tune of everything I had.
It put the pub in public.
I’ll give up my seat
on this world’s barstool
and let some other prophet
buy the next round.
Like this:
Tags: Christian, poetry, prophecy, prophet, the world, witness
You can comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site.
September 29, 2011 at 3:55 pm
Great post today. I really enjoyed reading it very much. You have an excellent blog here. Thanks again for sharing.
Take a look at – The Leave are Changing
September 30, 2011 at 11:41 am
And thank you for your encouragement and for dropping by.
September 29, 2011 at 7:06 pm
“I’ll give up my seat
on this world’s barstool
and let some other prophet
buy the next round.”
This is wonderful last stanza to a good poem.
September 29, 2011 at 9:37 pm
Thank you for your comment. I appreciate knowing from readers what is effective as well as what isn’t. You are very helpful.
September 29, 2011 at 8:59 pm
I hope you never give up your seat – your insights are invaluable!!!
September 29, 2011 at 9:38 pm
Thank you. There is some divided opinion on that question, of course…
September 30, 2011 at 2:22 am
Hi Carroll. This is truly excellent, some very innovative ideas & words…
“The music rolled off the keys / like a particularly satisfying swear word off the tongue” – a stunning start, continuing all the way to the final stanza.
I suspect you will get too many positive comments about this one to hide your talents… best –D
October 1, 2011 at 6:31 pm
Thank you Dan. My daughter Roseanna, who is 18, and I have a poetry “competition” where we take turns coming up with a first line and each writing a poem coming from it. The first two lines were actually her suggestion one week. I think she hasn’t finished her poem from them. I’ve posted two other poems that started by her suggestion.
October 2, 2011 at 4:17 pm
Which poems come from Roseanna’s suggestions? It is a wonderful idea! I am glad the poetic talent continues to the next generation. Vivian
October 2, 2011 at 6:22 pm
Lampshade and Cynicism lol were all started by her. She is a good writer and is now majoring in creative writing, a freshman at the local state university. I am trying to talk her in to posting her stuff on a website of her own but she doesn’t need anymore uses of time. If she won’t do it, maybe I’ll put some of her poems on here…
November 2, 2011 at 12:41 pm
“The music rolled off the keys
like a particularly satisfying swear word off the tongue.”
Not how I would describe music, so I’m glad to come across your poem. I like it when writers can make their readers see things differently with unlikely comparisons that somehow work.
November 2, 2011 at 3:02 pm
Thank you for your comment. I am glad that line works. Perhaps you are familiar with the Bruce Cockburn song “Maybe the Poet” that has the lines “Maybe you and he will not agree/ but you need him to show you the ways to see”? Anyway, thanks for the encouragement.
November 5, 2011 at 11:38 pm
No, I wasn’t familiar with that, but I just Googled it and listened to it on YouTube. Thanks for the recommendation!